Warning - Train Weasel Alert; or, the Ethics of Some People Defy Belief

This train is overfull: people are standing at the ends of the carriages.

I've just watched a deeply loathsome weasel of a business type doing the most incredibly unethical thing of trying to keep the seat next to him empty. He's at a four-person table - all unreserved - where three seats were taken: he was in the aisle seat and "guarding" the empty window seat. Nice.

This creep lied to the first person, a black woman, who asked him about it. Then he initially lied again, but backed down gracelessly, when someone a bit more assertive (and whiter, but I am sure this was not a factor, yeah right) tried some time later. He had a very lame story about how someone had been sitting there and he thought they were coming back, but I am absolutely 100% certain that this was the purest b*ll*cks. The stuff spread out on the seat and table, making it look occupied, was all his as became clear when he had to shift it all to let the second lady sit down. Indeed, just from my memory of comings and goings as people boarded - as it happens, I was on first - I'm very clear that no-one had sat there at all on this service. Which is how Mr Weasel planned to keep it.

What a weasel, what an utter creep. Of course you'll never read this, oh weasel of seat D31 on the 1545 Piccadilly to Euston train, and even if you did you probably wouldn't care anyway, since you've obviously already decided that your desire for space for your weasel laptop and your unethical business weasel papers is far more important than anyone else's need to sit down on this ghastly overcrowded train. You horrible, horrible creep.

I don't like to be vindictive but I confess I am tempted to hope that your hard disk fails, soon, and badly, and that your last good backup was made on or before 28th August 2006. You weasel, you miserable miserable weasel. I've never met you but I really don't like you.

Update: you have been saved by the delete key from a looooong piece debating the rights and wrongs of this in more detail: my tendency to be ridiculously judgemental; the nature of Cosmic Justice; the question of in what scenarios the Train Weasel's behaviour might have been reasonable; an ting.

I spent hours on this but, on the final re-reading, came to realize that it contained nothing of merit.

Woo yay let's hear it for the delete key!